My anxiety first presented itself when I was a little girl. I can remember not being able to fall asleep on a daily basis, because I had irrational fears that my parents were going to die in their sleep, or I was going to be kidnapped, or the rapture was going to happen, and I would be left behind. I know every little kid has their fears, but now that I am an adult, I can see that mine were not normal- they were extreme.
I often made my self sick, because I was so fearful and anxious.
For years, I was told by my parent’s and by doctors that “I must just have a sensitive stomach, I worry too much, it’s all in my head, just STOP worrying.” Well, I couldn’t. And, because I was always told to just “trust Jesus, and pray”, my anxiety and my relationship with Christ suffered for most of my childhood. I always had this feeling that I was different- that somehow I wasn’t being a good enough Christian, because otherwise I wouldn’t worry since that’s not “biblical” and all. [Read more…]